Characteristics of A True Friend

CHARACTERISTICS OF TRUE FRIENDS

  

Ecclesiastes 4:9  Two are better than one, Because they have a good reward for their labor.

Proverbs 18:24 A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

While studying Joshua 9 for my last blog, I became interested in what the bible says about friendships.  I saw that representatives from a nation came pretending to be someone they weren't with the intent of deceiving Israel into entering into an agreement with them. This got me thinking about friendships so I looked up some of the characteristics of true friendships.  I've listed just a few below and hope you enjoy the read!

• True friends don't turn you away from God!

Deuteronomy 13:6

If your brother, the son of your mother, your son or your daughter, the wife of your bosom, or your friend who is as your own soul, secretly entices you, saying, ‘Let us go and serve other gods,’ which you have not known, neither you nor your fathers, 7 of the gods of the people which are all around you, near to you or far off from you, from one end of the earth to the other end of the earth, 8you shall not consent to him or listen to him.

• True friends are not greedy!  They gladly share!

1 Samuel 30:26
Now when David came to Ziklag, he sent some of the spoil to the elders of Judah, to his friends, saying, “Here is a present for you from the spoil of the enemies of the LORD”

Remember, the friends David shared with were those too tired to pursue but they had been with him all along.  Some of the men wanted to keep all the rewards for themselves but David was faithful.  They were friends and they were not forgotten or cut out of the deal!

• True friends speak face to face and are not pretenders.  What you see is what you get!!

Exodus 33:11
So the LORD spoke to Moses face to face, as a man speaks to his friend. And he would return to the camp, but his servant Joshua the son of Nun, a young man, did not depart from the tabernacle.

• True friends will tell you the truth, even if it hurts.  Their truthfulness has a healing effect!

Proverbs 27:6
Faithful are the wounds of a friend, But the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.

• True friends don't abandon you in hard times. On the contrary they comfort you.

Job 2:11 Now when Job’s three friends heard of all this adversity that had come upon him, each one came from his own place—Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite. For they had made an appointment together to come and mourn with him, and to comfort him.

• True friends are your friends when you have money and when you don't!

Proverbs 14:20
The poor man is hated even by his own neighbor, But the rich has many friends.

Proverbs 19:4
Wealth makes many friends, But the poor is separated from his friend.

Proverbs 19:6
Many entreat the favor of the nobility, And every man is a friend to one who gives gifts.

Proverbs 19:7
All the brothers of the poor hate him; How much more do his friends go far from him! He may pursue them with words, yet they abandon him.

• True friends show kindness when you're down and out!

Job 6:14
“To him who is afflicted, kindness should be shown by his friend, even though he forsakes the fear of the Almighty.

• True friends do not undermine one another! Undermine- meaning to deal secretly by removing support or to secretly attack with the intent of deceiving or seeming harmless with actions bringing devastating results.  True friends do not do this!

Job 6:27
Yes, you overwhelm the fatherless, And you undermine your friend.

• True friends rejoice with you!

Luke 15:6
And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and neighbors, saying to them, ‘Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep which was lost!’

• True friends don't mock and scorn.

Job 12:4
“I am one mocked by his friends, who called on God, and He answered him, The just and blameless who is ridiculed.

Job 16:20
My friends scorn me;My eyes pour out tears to God.

• True friends don't only flatter.

Job 17:5
He who speaks flattery to his friends, even the eyes of his children will fail.

• True friends don't forget you!

Job 19:14
My relatives have failed, And my close friends have forgotten me.

• True friends don't turn against you when you don't have money.  Maybe like Job you had money and it seemed everyone was your friend but when they hard times came, they were nowhere to be found.

Job 19:19
All my close friends abhor me, And those whom I love have turned against me.

• True friends pray for their friends.  They also forgive friends that have wronged them.  God's favor is upon those that forgive and pray for friends.

Job 42:10
And the LORD restored Job’s losses when he prayed for his friends. Indeed the LORD gave Job twice as much as he had before.

• True friends don't gossip about each other!

Psalm 15:3
He who does not backbite with his tongue, nor does evil to his neighbor, nor does he take up a reproach against his friend.

• Gossip separates friends!  True friends don't do it!

Proverbs 16:28
A perverse man sows strife, And a whisperer separates the best of friends.

Proverbs 17:9
He who covers a transgression seeks love, But he who repeats a matter separates friends.

• True friends do not betray!  Remember Judas, the betrayer!

Psalm 41:9
Even my own familiar friend in whom I trusted, Who ate my bread, Has lifted up his heel against me.

• True friends love no matter what. They're there through thick and think. They walk through adversity with you!  Adversity will reveal who is a true friend and who is a self-seeker!

Proverbs 17:17
A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity.

• True friends are friendly!  If someone's not friendly, they either aren't your friend or they still have a lot to learn about relationships!  Jesus is your best friend and when it seems you have no friends, there is a friend that sticks close by!

I hope you've enjoyed this post!  Just studying these passages alone makes me want to be a better friend.  I hope it's done the same for you!

*All scripture references taken from:  http://www.biblegateway.com/keyword/index.php?search=friend&version1=NKJV&searchtype=all&limit=none&wholewordsonly=no&startnumber=26&startnumber=51&startnumber=76

Two Methods Same Devil

TWO METHODS SAME DEVIL

In Joshua 9, Joshua was leading the armies of Israel into the promises of God's covenant.

They had won two important battles in their promised land- both Jericho and Ai.

God had told them to drive out all of the inhabitants!

Each king of the surrounding nations had heard and each king was afraid.  They were quickly scrambling to figure out how to preserve their place, ensure their futures and keep their territory!  Remember we are not now driving out people but we ARE driving out the enemy of the souls of men! The other nation chose instead not to fight but to reserve their territory through deception!  If the devil can't get you to fall, he may try to make a deal!

DISTRACTION OR ATTACK

We need to stay focused on the plan of God in our lives and be alert to any devises of the enemy to lead us off track including friendships that appear to be one thing but are really another and agreements that look nice but are really distractions!

 

Six kings gathered together to strategize against Israel. This was the obvious thing enemies would be expected to do and did not catch Israel unaware or off guard.

One nation however did not join the unified front against Israel.  They approached the problem in an entirely different matter- a plan of self-preservation and deception!

Know for certain that your enemy wants to retain a foothold in your life!  If he can't get you to fail one way, he'll attempt to stop or hinder you another way! We must be alert to the plans and devises of the devil!

1 Peter 5:8   Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.

We must not be ignorant!  We must be aware that we do have an enemy that would do anything to stop us!  He is not stupid and will try various ways to stop us.  This is not to project fear.  We have courage, authority and the Word of God but we also have wisdom and discernment!  We just need to be aware and on our toes and be aware that the devil is wicked and we are in the war of the ages- the battle for the hearts of men and the devil wants to render us ineffective and retain footholds.  These men were supposed to be run from their place but because of trickery, they were preserved.

ANOTHER METHOD

Contrasted with the kings of nations that banned together to physically fight Israel is another nation called Gibeon.  They didn't take the obvious route but tackled the problem from another direction.  Take a look at Joshua 9: 3-6

Joshua 9: 3- But when the inhabitants of Gibeon heard what Joshua had done to Jericho and Ai, 4 they worked craftily, and went and pretended to be ambassadors. And they took old sacks on their donkeys, old wineskins torn and mended, 5 old and patched sandals on their feet, and old garments on themselves; and all the bread of their provision was dry and moldy. 6 And they went to Joshua, to the camp at Gilgal, and said to him and to the men of Israel, “We have come from a far country; now therefore, make a covenant with us.” 

The definition of craftily is skillful in underhanded or evil schemes, cunning and deceptive (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/craftily)

We should not be caught unawares - but should be wise with understanding hearts.  The bible tells us to be alert!

2 Corinthians 2:11 11 lest Satan should take advantage of us; for we are not ignorant of his devices.

• These sought to preserve themselves through deception. 
• They pretended to be someone they were not.  
• Their motives were for self-preservation.
• They had their own agenda!  Watch out for friends with agendas!
• They became a distraction and a hindrance.

Israel was forced into an agreement they never should have been in.

Because Israel was not alert and aware they are still experiencing problems today- thousands of years later!

PRACTICAL APPLICATION

On a practical note:

• We should not be quick to enter into agreements.
• We should know those that seek to covenant with us and we should know their motives.
• People aren't always who they say they are and their story isn't always true!
• Be careful of people that want to attach themselves to you but their motives are wrong.

This doesn't say that we should be suspicious of every friendship but just to know that as we walk through our spiritual journey, if the devil can't stop us with warfare, he will attempt deception and/or distraction!

The bible says the devil is crafty.  It says he walks around as a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour.  We need to be as wise as serpents but harmless as doves, know those we enter into agreements with and be careful to stay focused on the plan of God without distraction!  Amen!